Fake Artist Statement #6: George W. Bush

(compiled from actual quotes)

I was raised in West Texas, in the middle of the desert, a long way away from anywhere, hardly. I’m the commander — see, I don’t need to explain. I’m the decider. I’m not very analytical. You know I don’t spend a lot of time thinking about myself, about why I do things. I’m the master of low expectations. I talk to families who die. I tell people, let’s don’t fear the future, let’s shape it. But oftentimes I’m asked: Why?

In this job you’ve got a lot on your plate on a regular basis; you don’t have much time to sit around and wander, lonely, in the Oval Office, kind of asking different portraits, ‘How do you think my standing will be?. I always jest to people, the Oval Office is the kind of place where people stand outside, they’re getting ready to come in and tell me what for, and they walk in and get overwhelmed by the atmosphere. And they say ‘man, you’re looking pretty. They misunderestimated me.

For the viewers, there’s no sun. This is still a dangerous world. It’s a world of madmen and uncertainty and potential mential losses. But I know what the story’s about. I am a person who recognizes the fallacy of humans. There’s no cave deep enough for America, or dark enough to hide. I know what I believe. I will continue to articulate what I believe and what I believe—I believe what I believe is right. Home is important. It’s important to have a home.

(via paddyjohnson)

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